Sonic at the Beach
by puffmouse82
Summary: Sonic and friends go to the beach. Amy attacks girls Sonic flirts with. Shadow and Silver have a run in with a disturbingly muscular hedgehog. Marine, Tails, and Cream try to make money to buy Popsicles. Rated K for gross-out humor.


**A/N: Happy summer, everyone! Today Sonic and friends are headed to the beach! Too bad it's raining 24/7 where I am, but at least the place where I live is coming out of a drought!**

**(If it's not summer and you're reading this, I wrote this on June 15, 2013)**

"I love the beach! Sunshine, sand, and-" Sonic froze as he caught site of the ocean. "-WATER!" He began to run around in circles, jump around and run upside-down in the air.

"How is he doing that?" Tails asked himself as Sonic ran upside down in the air around their car.

"Who cares? I'm gonna go get a tan!" Rouge said as she got out a tanning mirror.

"But Rouge, tanning causes skin cancer!" Tails responded.

"...Well, my beach day is offically ruined." Rouge threw the tanning mirror aside. "I'm gonna get a popsicle." She said as she walked over to the ice-cream stand.

"Ooh, me too!" Cream followed. So did Tails and Marine.

"Are you done yet?" Shadow asked a twitching upside-down Sonic.

"I think so..." Sonic then fell to the ground with a thud. "A-Are there any bandages in the car?"

Meanwhile, at the ice-cream stand..."What do you mean you don't have chocolate popsicles?!" Rouge yelled.

"I-I don't even think those exist!" The poor ice-cream seller cowered in fear. "Would you like a chocolate frozen yogurt instead?" He offered.

"Thank you."

"That'll be $1.00."  
"Here you go." Rouge walked away to go take a nap.

"Marine, I just realized something." Cream said.

"What's that, mate?" Marine asked.

"We have no money!"

"Well, we can make some! Tails, get a tiny hoodie from the 1970s, a salamander, tiny rollerskates, and that tanning mirror Rouge threw away! We're gonna be rich!"

"Hey Sonic! I didn't manage to find any bandages but I did find a inflate-y chair thing!" Silver said, holding an un-inflated chair thing. He tried to blow it up with his mouth, but ended up turning blue in the face.

"You're supposed to use the pump, you moron." Shadow said, holding a hand pump.

Silver gasped for air. "Oh." He grabbed the hand pump and began putting air in the chair thing.

"I need a doctor!" Sonic groaned. Just that moment, a girl in a bikini walked by. "Never mind! Give me that chair thing! There's flirting to do!"

"Flirting?" Amy whispered. "With someone other than me? That's not happening." She growled.

By this time, Shadow and Silver had walked off past the ice-cream stand, but they were stopped by a disturbingly muscular hedgehog.

"Back off, I own this side of the beach!"

"Okay!" Silver began to back away, but Shadow grabbed him by the chest fur.

"You can't own only a side of the beach!"

"Oh yeah? Here's the deed!" The disturbingly muscular hedgehog shoved a paper in Shadow's face. Shadow crumpled the paper into a ball and ate it.

"If your so tough, disturbingly muscular hedgehog, eat this..." Shadow looked at the ground and picked up a blob of chao poop. "Eat this poop!" The disturbingly muscular hedgehog shoved the poop into his mouth and swallowed. Shadow vomited.

"Hey you, shiny!" The disturbingly muscular hedgehog pointed to Silver with a disturbingly muscular finger. "Eat that vomit!"

"Why me?" Silver said.

"If you don't eat it, I'll pummel you!"

"Okay!"

"Yes! The roller-skating salamander show was a huge success! We've made five bucks!" Marine said happily.

"But I want to buy a rollercoaster." Tails said, feeding the salamander whatever salamanders eat.  
"Then we'll make our show better! Cream, get a popsicle stick, a decorative vase, and a tiny ladder!"

"Okay!"

"Hey baby." Sonic flirted from his floaty chair to a swimming girl. "There's room on this floaty chair thing for two...If I scooch over a little, anyways." Suddenly, the Jaws music began playing in the background. Amy closed in on the unsuspecting girl, prepared her hammer, and burst through the water screaming.

"AAH! RABID AMY!" Sonic yelled, and he jumped from his floaty chair to a beach ball to a swim noodle to shore. "Phew. Oh wait, I think my leg is broken."

"Eat this rabid animal!" Shadow yelled, holding out a chao that was foaming at the mouth.  
"Eat this mushroom!" The disturbingly muscular hedgehog yelled, foaming at the mouth a little from the rabid chao. Shadow did so.

"That wasn't so bad."  
"It was a poisonous mushroom."

"Oh Chaos..." Shadow keeled over.

"I win! You have to leave this beach...WEARING THESE TUTUS!"

"Augh..." Shadow groaned and vomited again.

"So the salamander roller-skates on the tanning mirror to the ladder, which it climbs up, then jumps off the popsicle stick diving board into the decorative vase full of water!" Marine explained.

"Are you Marine Ocean?" A police officer asked.  
"Yes?"

"I'm afraid you need a liscense to make money on this beach. You and your friends will have to leave."

"Oh darn it! I never got that rollercoaster!" Tails grumbled.

"And you know what? We never bought those popsicles." Cream said.

"Hey there." Sonic flirted to another girl as he limped towards her.  
"No."

"Come back!" Sonic yelled. "I didn't even get to the pick-up line!"

Amy came running with her hammer, but a police officer grabbed her.  
"We've heard reports of a female hedgehog attempting to attack people with a giant hammer, and you fit that description. You're under arrest!"

"What? You can't arrest me! I'm Amy Rose!"  
"Who?"  
"I help Sonic save the world sometimes."

"Oh, then your punishment is reduced to a $300 fine and you can never come to this beach again."

"Geez."

Rouge woke up to Shadow, Silver, Sonic, Amy, Marine, Tails, and Cream surrounding her.

"What's going on?"

"All of us have to leave except Sonic, but he can't drive and his leg's actually broken." Shadow said, trying to use a magazine to hide the fact that he was wearing a tutu.

"Okay...Let's go then."

"This was the worst beach day ever." Silver murmured.


End file.
